'It’s important to remember the things that make Mammy smile, other than being Mammy'
What makes you smile Mammy?
“My children’s arms around my neck… spending time with my family… seeing my children’s faces when… hearing my children’s voices…cuddles with my babies…”
Yadda yadda yeah.
Of course these things make you happy. And so they should. Being Mammy is the most rewarding and smile inducing thing in the world.
But Back up Bitcheepoos. I asked what makes YOU happy. What things, (not including your precious little cherubs and their hillarious/cute/wonderful milestones), make Mammy smile. I want the OTHER answers, the things OTHER than your kids that make you smile, because it’s important to remember the things that make Mammy smile, other than being Mammy.
Here are some of mine:
Food: Food is possibly my favourite thing in the world. Nothing gives me the same joy as good food. The smells. The textures. The flavours… I have been known to make questionable noises while eating certain things. Add a smooth warm wine to a Prawn Balti and I may just love you forever. Eating is not just functional. It’s sensual. God dammit, sometimes food is just sexy. End of. I’m salivating now just thinking about it… To Hell with diamonds…The way to this woman’s heart is through my belly. Just feeeeeeed me. I’m like a puppy. I’m not beyond being bribed to do tricks…
When someone else thinks of me: When Himself leaves my cup and pod ready in the coffee machine before I get up. When my friend hands me a pair of ridiculous slippers just because she thought of me when she saw them. When someone calls me, not looking for something, just to say hi. When someone texts me out of the blue.
Chatting: With two chatterboxes for daughters, I don’t get a word in edgeways. If I get the rare chance to meet my mate, my Him or my Mum for a cuppa without my little people, Oh but it does make me smile. Uninterrupted, uncensored conversation with our favourite grown up people is soooooooo good for us, isn’t it?
Hugs: Apart from my Him and the Hers, there are some people whose hugs make me especially happy. My Daddy is the bestest Hugger in the world. End of story. No one will ever win an argument with me about that. I love hugs from my siblings, especially the two who flew over the Irish Sea to make their nests. It doesn’t matter how long has passed between hugs, they’re stronger than ever each time.
Being alone: The true joys of being alone can never be understood until you are a parent. When I get it, I take it. And I’m talking ANYWHERE! The bathroom. The shower. The car journey between drop off and work. Sometimes, I run awful errands just to get 25 minutes alone! Even putting the bin up to the road is a chance to stop and breath and be alone for a minute. Grabbing a coffee alone is a luxury. I get up most mornings before 6am, just to have an hour to myself. And who needs a holiday when you have the Supermarket to mosey through all by yourself?
The Beach: The beach near my home is my absolute favourite place. It’s my thinking place. Yes I love to walk here with the girls, but add this one to Number 5 and you’ll see a content and happy S-Mum. If I stand on that shore long enough, all the world realigns and everything is better. It’s cleansing. It blasts away my stresses. And I’m discovering as I get older, that the worse the weather is, the better the blast.
People watching: This one makes me smile just thinking about it. I LOVE to people-watch. I love to pretend and make up what is happening with them. I write them into characters and scenarios in my head, and sometimes in my book. (If you have ever passed me, especially if I’m alone, there’s a chance you’ve inspired something. That counts as a disclaimer right?)
Exercise: This one might not be everyone’s list, but it’s definitely something that makes me smile. It also makes me swear, grunt and cry, but so does food! There is a fine line between pleasure and pain isn’t there!? (If you ARE thinking about making some time for yourself to get fit and have fun, I know this great gym…)
Dancing: I love to dance with my kids and I love to dance with my little stars at school. I love to dance with my LMS gang and I love to dance on my own, in my kitchen. I’ll dance anywhere.
A long shower: Let us be honest, suddy, candlelit bubble baths are pretty difficult to manage when you’re a Mum. They’re amazing, but often, they’re just too time consuming and not worth the hassle and cleaning etc afterwards. But a shower, where you aren’t hearing the screams of your minions and take the time to leave conditioner in your hair for 3 minutes? These are the things that dreams are made of… 🙂
Smells: Stop and smell the roses, or the cut grass, or the baking bread. Breathe in your Granny’s perfume, your baby’s head, the chocolate cake. ALWAYS take a second to smell your wine. Or your coffee. Or the washing powder. Or the smell in your parent’s hall when you visit. Smells are memories. Memories make me smile.
I could go on. And even as I write this and think about these things, I realise that they are largely easy to do, find and that they are mostly free. And so it makes me wonder, why I don’t do them more often.
Of course, time is an issue. Being a busy Mammy with two jobs and 20,000 other things going on, will always make time an issue, but at the same time, none of these things are outrageous or elusive really.
And so maybe it’s time to make time to do them.
So now, I ask you again. What makes YOU smile? (apart from your Darlings).
Write down a few of them and stick the list on your fridge or in your diary. Then, try to tick one or two of them off that list at least once a week.